NMU Attempts To Promote Oldest Service

A r t i c l e  b y  E t a n  S h o r t z

MARQUETTE, MI -- Dissatisfied by previous awareness and usage, NMU Public Safety officials have decided to attempt to make more public the Northern Michigan University and Public Safety Escort Service.

   For more than ten years, the NMU Police Department has offered an Escort Service. This service is available to all students, employees and visitors while they are on the NMU Campus. The Escort Service will operate during the hours of darkness seven days a week.

   "I'm amazed that this service hasn't been utilized more often." Said Captain Major, head of Public Safety at NMU. "Especially since it's free to students and faculty, being funded only from a small percentage of tuition and the Student Fund. I mean, heck, we sure like to make use of it."

   Other than the frequent attempted use by a local teenager, Robert, the Service has only seen 40% of it's available student workers in action an estimated 70% of the time they were available.

   "I sure wish more people knew about it," Said one of the student Escorts who asked to remain anonymous. "Of all the ways to pay tuition, this has got to be one of the best. Most of the other people attending this college are going to get laptops, but I get to actually be a laptop."

   "Your safety is our first concern," Added Major. "We've teamed up with the student health workers that give those safe-sex presentations. They seem to really know their stuff. All of our escorts have put in the time and effort required to be professional at what they do."

   The department has attempted to make obtaining an Escort quick and easy. With just a phone call, a Student Escort will be dispatched to meet you. Students and employees will be required to show their ID cards, while visitors to the campus can use their driver's license as identification.

   "Dang." added Robert. "I don't get my license until next year."