Random Poop

• Did you guys all know that our university president isn't an actual real person? Nope, just a prototype droid manufactured by IBM to infiltrate schools and set up deals with them as a way to dump their junky laptops.
  
  
• There's a ton of new "blue poles" around campus, for emergencies. I wonder how many pranks Public Safety will see with those things. Kinda like ringin' somebody's doorbell and running off.
  
  
• Did anyone catch the publicity hype this summer about the "laptop convoy" from Wisconsin? From the way NMU pushed this "news," you'd have thought that we had purchased the space shuttle and were bringing it up for the aviation department to play around with out behind Jacobetti. So a bunch of trucks are bringing crummy laptops from one state to another. Whoopty frickin' doo. I wonder if they'll have a problem finding a place to park on campus.
  
  
• Has anyone seen Sami the Jerk? He dropped off a few items on my desk the other day and hasn't been seen since. His mom is worrying about him. If you see him wandering around campus, knock him out and email us so we can come get him.
  
  
• It's official: if an office in Cohodas makes a mistake and you lose your classes, then those classes get filled before you can get back in, you're screwed. Even though it wasn't your mistake, you get to suffer for it. Sources have confirmed this. Welcome aboard freshmen...